Minutes turn into days

when you wait for something to happen. That's why at night time people fall apart because they don't keep themselves busy. Can't fight what's going to happen though, gotta see it, face and embrace it. Anything you do can be done right. Right changes with each person, each situation. It's not constant, it's dynamic. It's crazy to me how people think so selfish. The way they act, needs not be adjusted but instead everyone else around them's should. Wtf? No.

I just find it naive to judge someone if you have no hand or presence in what your judging them on at all. It's called ethnocentrism, where you judge someone based your standards rather than cultural relativism, which is basing someone off their own terms and life. Yea I get fucked up, lately more than often, but fuck you. As soon as I do that, all of a sudden I hear I'm going down the wrong path, i'm fucking up, i'm this and i'm that. But when I wasn't doing that, I wasn't even in school. I was actually worse off with no direction, not saying drinking found my way because that's fucking dumb but i'm saying X doesn't equal Y , meaning they aren't variables that are dependent on each other. One doesn't affect the other. Point being, Don't fucking judge me. You don't know what I WANT, or what I'M DOING. Who I am, doesn't mean I am the person I was yesterday or the person I will be tomorrow. It's who I am right now, created by myself in the past and affecting my future. I have the choice, not you, to either continue or change. You only have the choice to believe me or not.  Everybody knows, I've given a million people chances that shouldn't have had them. That got shit talked all day then I gave them a chance. That went to prison and I still send $$. I can't stand a weak brain person that can't think for themselves.

Shit's just crazy to me, how ppl can say 1 thing, do another and feel cool about it. If I do that shit, I feel horrible. Like actually give a fuck about how the things you do make someone else feel. I made this blog to write about my music but my music is my life, this is the shit I go through and I guarantee you this shit is on my tape. Poowwwwwwwwww. A big fuck you headed right your way. I'm a cold fucking person cus I can't feel nothing no more.

CHARTT

There's very few

I care about these days. I really don't feel anything anymore. I like to chase thrills I guess. My music used to fire me up but now it's just my music, my life, I live it everyday. The shit I say is nothing new to me because I been through it. When people tell me their problems, it's nothing new. Girls, music, money, people who don't like me, I mean fuck I just can't feel any feelings anymore. I've gotten a little reckless, but who cares. Live life, you can't let everything happen, sometimes saying yes to things you are on the fence about allows you experience life from a different perspective, AND everyone knows the world could use people who aren't tunnel minded. You gotta go make shit happen.

They say, "oh no, when your drunk or blah blah you are a different person." NO, you are YOU. All of the things you do drunk can be done sober or else you couldn't do it. It's just triggers that allow you to flick the switch.

I haven't wrote in here since november, I moved back to florida. Got a job at a fine dine restaurant, all the money is going toward my music being mixed right now and then to getting videos made. I have 13 songs done, 6 more to go. Studio at Plush in orlando is booked this monday. It's been too long, wow. 5 years. I know a lot of you people keep asking me about it and most of you just wana keep tabs on me hoping I fail and if I don't make a justification on why I did and you didn't.

People are weird. Society definitely shapes us. If someone with my same DNA grew up different than me in a different area, they would be different. Maybe not physically but definitely mentally, emotionally, etc.

For the record, I know a lot of you women think I'm out here fucking every girl possible, walking around left and right. You don't know me at all. I've had about 3 serious relationships in my life, in comparison to people who relationship hop through 10 different people in 2 years. I don't get attached to girls and when I do it's serious, for me at least. Any of the girls I been with, even if I don't like them now, are and will continue to be special people. So my problem sounds a lot less worse than the people who can't communicate their feelings, cheat, talk to 20 people and pick the best one, get in a relationship just for their own needs emotionally...thats called using someone, to make society happy, or because they aren't strong enough to be on their own at night time.

If this were a room, i'd walk out with my two middle fingers up right now.

CHARTT